JABbering Stooge

My mother is a church administrator (probably a bad job choice, if Tim LaHaye’s End Times Wankery series is to be believed), and as such, occasionally receives magazines aimed at church administrators. Ordinarily, I wouldn’t mention this, but there was an article in a recent issue of one such magazine, Church Business, that bears mentioning, particularly in light of the recent Bill Dono-spew nastiness. The article in question, entitled “It’s Not Supposed to Make You Sick,” is actually an excerpt from the book Soul Cravings by Erwin Raphael McManus. If you ask me, it is a ringing condemnation of the tactics espoused by the Religious Right (a.k.a., the “Theocracy NOW!” crowd). In fact, I would even argue that it is required reading for those wishing to argue in favor of a liberal Christian ethos. The comparison between “Syrian Diet Coke” (read the article for the context) and Western Christianity - particularly in light of the Religious Right’s efforts to declare themselves the sole representatives of Western Christianity - is incredibly apt. The opening sentence in the excerpt is especially salient in regards to the recent Edwards blogger kerfuffle.

So many things that have the name of Jesus on the label have really nothing to do with Jesus in the end.

Indeed.

I’m sure you may have received the following e-mail in some form or another. But the version my mother sent me a while ago amused me to no end, mainly because people like Professional Outrage Maven Bill Dono-spew hate the grain of truth in it:

The Preacher’s Son

An old country preacher had a teenage son, and it was getting time the boy should give some thought to choosing a profession.

Like many young men, the boy didn’t really know what he wanted to do, and he didn’t seem too concerned about it.

One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment.

He went into the boy’s room and placed on his study table three objects: - a Bible, - a silver dollar, and - a bottle of whisky.

“I’ll just hide behind the door,” the old preacher said to himself, “and when he comes home from school this afternoon, I’ll see which object he picks up.

If it’s the Bible, he’s going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would be!

If he picks up the dollar, he’s going to be a businessman, and that would be okay, too.

But if he picks up the bottle, he’s going to be a no-good drunkard, and, Lord, what a shame that would be.”

The old man waited anxiously, and soon heard his son’s footsteps as he entered the house whistling and headed for his room.

He tossed his books on the bed, and as he turned to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table.

With curiosity in his eye, he walked over to inspect them. Finally, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm.

He picked up the silver dollar and dropped it into his pocket.

He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink.

“Lord have mercy,” the old preacher whispered, “he’s gonna be a Republican Congressman!”

Your Mileage May Vary

It has come to my attention that yesterday marked the end of the second year of my adventures in blogging. Last year at about this time, I made an extraordinarily long, rambling post highlighting just about every single post that I had made in my first year of blogging. Obviously, this was a BAD IDEA™. I’d like to avoid that this year, so I will just post the my top ten favorite posts from the last year.

Top Ten JABbering Stooge Posts For 2006-2007

1. Israel GOOD! Muslims BAD!

2. I must be desperate for attention (my first and, thus far, only catblogging post)

3. Neal Boortz is an idiot

4. Something to think about…

5. Playing Catchup: The “Librul” Media strikes again!

6. NBC on Benedict Arnold I: “No really! He’s a moderate! Honest!”

7. They have not lead [sic]. We will.

8. This day in history…

9. Oscar…Mike…Golf…What an embarrassment!

10. ID4 turns 10

And the beat goes on and on…

I honestly don’t know what annoys me more about Professional Outrage Maven Bill Dono-spew - the fact that he regularly says hateful, bigoted things, or the fact that the “librul media” constantly gives him a forum to say hateful, bigoted things.

Case in point, his latest incident of manufactured outrage - directed at two bloggers hired by presidential hopeful John Edwards.

Sidebar:It’s interesting to note in this whole kerfluffle that the focus was almost exclusively on Marcotte and McEwan, falsely suggesting that only liberal bloggers tend to be “unhinged” in their commentary, sparing a bare minimum on the McCain blogger who has ruffled many a feather with his “Murka is a Christian Nation™®©” tirades and confict-of-interest-prone blogging. In fact, I would be pleasantly surprised if the revelation that Duncan Hunter’s S.C. campaign chair had some “intemperate” things to say about Buddhism and Islam (His exact words were “Screw the Buddhists and kill the Muslims” - he was so proud of his bigotry that he wanted it put on the record) gets more than one nanosecond of airtime on “librul” MSRNC or CNN (hat tip: Roger Ailes via Duncan “Atrios” Black).

But back to the Modern-Day Pharisee. What really got my goat about the whole situation was his appearance Tucker Carlson’s show (without any liberal opposition, natch) during which Carlson did nothing but verbally fellate this gasbag:

Mind you, this is the guy who famously said (among other things) “Hollywood is controlled by secular Jews who hate Christianity in general and Catholicism in particular,” “People don’t trust the Muslims when it comes to liberty,” (as if “Theocracy NOW!” proponents such as yourself are better?) and, of course, that homosexuals “need to apologize to straight people” for the crime of just existing, apparently.

Sadly, the blanket media campaign of manufactured outrage seems to have worked, as first Marcotte and now McEwan have both resigned from Edwards’ campaign. Score one for Dono-spew’s “Victory Through Intimidation” tactics. You know, Bill, there was another group that made the newsreels for their “Victory Through Intimidation” campaign. But those newsreels are kinda hard to understand because the narration is in German!!!