JABbering Stooge

It seems like only yesterday that liberals were frustrated with their choice of candidates following the “librul media”-induced implosion of Howard Dean’s 2004 presidential candidacy, while conservatives were just pleased as punch with The Most Holy George W. Christ.

Now, the tables have turned. The labor unions, a key voting bloc, are now so pleased with the entire Democratic field that they may forego a primary endorsement. The Rethugs’ candidate of choice? “None of the above.”

Even sweeter is the fact that Fred Thompson, long considered to be conservatives “Great White Hope™,” fell well short of the expected $5 million that he’d boasted he’d be able to bring in. If we can replicate our success in the ‘06 midterms, then no matter who the Democratic nominee is, he/she will wipe the floor with the Rethuglican candidate.

Neal Boortz in his natural race-baiting environment.

Ah, Mexico - home of corrupt government, source of tainted food and of immigrants (both legal and illegal), and now, site of the world’s largest experiment in indentured servitude. At issue is the latest anti-labor practice engaged in by that most notorious of human rights-abusing companies, Wal-Mart. The company has taken advantage of Mexico’s lax labor laws by employing teenagers as unpaid “volunteers.”

So why is this a problem? Well, if you have to rely on the kindness of strangers just to stay properly nourished and hydrated, as these “volunteers” do, you’d go hungry pretty damn quickly.

Now, I’m sure some of you are wondering what the connection to Neal “The Rarin’ Aryan™” Boortz is. I have two separate reasons for mentioning “The High Priest of the Church of Agitprop.” The first, most direct link is that Boortz has demagogued against even the basic concept of a minimum wage time after time after time. Boortz basically believes that every single grunt-level employee is worth precisely $0.00 per hour, and that every single executive-level corporate officer is worth $6.02 x 10²³ per second. Boortz’ wet-dream utopia would be a combination of Wal-Mart’s Mexico labor policy with those idiotic “right-to-work” laws prevalent in most Southern states. It’s perfect wingnut gold: companies get to treat entry-level employees like shit while the management skims off the top, and the employees can’t do anything to improve their lot because the law says your boss can fire you just because he woke up on the wrong side of the bed that morning. Heck, I’m sure he’d want to give that car dealership owner that murdered his employees for the crime of asking for a raise the Presidential Medal of Freedom.

The other reason that this news is relevant to Boortz is because, as I’ve noted before, Boortz frequently engages in racist rhetoric when discussing illegal immigration. In Boortz’ demented mind, all Latinos are unpersons worthy only of being shoved out of aircraft in flight and fed polonium tacos. I’m sure he’ll cream his pants when he finds out about this two-fer.