JABbering Stooge

This story in The Times of London comes to us from ThinkProgress. For the first time ever, Jane’s Information Group — a world-renowned military affairs think tank — has commissioned a study on the stability of the world’s nations. The findings have just been released for public consumption.

Some comments on the findings:

• America’s position as the 22^nd most stable country, while distressing, is not surprising — especially given the policies that the government has pursued over the last eight years.

• The real meat and potatoes of the study that one should take away from this article is that Afghanistan is far less stable than Iraq. Gee, I wonder why that could be?

Sadly, the wingnuts have built their own little bubble about the grim situation in Afghanistan. Their comments on The Times’ website about the story are particularly instructive:

Though this is a supposedly objective rating, criteria still reflect differing values that alter the scores.

The proliferation of small arms in the United States is deemed bad by many around the world (and in the US) and “cost” us some points, but it is deemed constitutional and normal by most in the US. It is simply part of our heritage and culture because we hold freedom so dear.

This culture, despite various shortcomings, has a history of defeating oppressive regimes, especially defending our allies.

Interestingly, the countries labeled as the most stable and prosperous still exist thanks to the US. We certainly can learn a great deal from each other and improve, but do not mess with our guns, lest there be no one left to save you again. Ja, Da?

By the way, it is sincerely very sad to see the growing trend of these fine European countries losing their own cultures, to the point of extinction one day. Please recognize and reverse this, as you do have so much to offer the world!

— Chris in Columbus, GA

Translation: This is the thanks we get for saving your @$$3z in WWII? Well, FUCK YOU, you biased fucks! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

Many countries have enjoyed stability and prosperity thanks to the Pax Americana. Not that many of the beneificiaries of her efforts would acknowledge it. They couldn’t bear the humiliation. You know you’re doing something right when so many envy, resent, and hate you. Cheerio and all that.

C. W. in Columbus, Ohio

Translation: Yeah, yeah, whatevah. You sick homos just hate us for our freedoms! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

I really don’t care what this ranking survey has to say. Every country has its good and bad points.

JMS in San Antonio, TX

Translation: LA-LA-LA-LA! I’M NOT LISTENING TO YOUR AMERICA-HATING GARBAGE! LA-LA-LA-LA-LA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

Boy, that really brings home Al Franken’s point about patriotism, doesn’t it?

[Conservatives] don’t get it. We love America just as much as they do. But in a different way. You see, they love America the way a four-year-old loves her mommy. Liberals love America like grown-ups. To a four-year-old, everything Mommy does is wonderful and anyone who criticizes Mommy is bad. Grown-up love means actually understanding what you love, taking the good with the bad, and helping your loved one grow. Love takes attention and work and is the best thing in the world.

That’s why we liberals want America to do the right thing. We know America is the hope of the world, and we love it and want it to do well. We also want it to do good.

— Al Franken, Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them: A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right, page 24 (hardcover edition)

Obama’s test: Can a liberal be a unifier?

John McCain is much more of a maverick than that far-left America-hating loon, Obama!

Seriously, could the “librul” media be any more brazen in their blatant boosterism of St. McCain? Dear God, Jan. 20, 2009 can’t come soon enough!

My God! It’s full of wankers!

* With apologies to Atrios, Arthur C. Clarke, and Stanley Kubrick.

Sweet Zombie Jesus, does the ratfucking ever end with this asshole? And as dday points out, this blowhard has had a history with Spitzer(Swallows) — going so far as to threaten the former governor’s father.

It’s the sort of thing that makes one wonder: what sort of grudge did he hold against Spitzer, that he was willing to go so far as to subvert an FBI investigation to do his dirty work for him? I guess questioning Obama’s patriotism, setting up an anti-Hillary 527 with a blatantly misogynist acronym and threatening Spitzer’s father wasn’t enough. He just had to give the former governor a good Rogering, as it were.

Perhaps its time someone did some digging for skeletons in Mr. Stone’s closet. After all the ratfucking he’s done to various Democrats over the years, he’s got a Nimitz-class carrier’s worth of karmic comeuppance coming to him.

* Via.

The Most Holy George W. Christ on the latest grim milestone from his pointless war:

One day, people will look back at this moment in history and say, “Thank God there were courageous people willing to serve because they laid the foundation for peace for generations to come,”

Um, no, Chimpy, people will look back on this moment in history and say, “Dear God in Heaven, why did the Supreme Court of the world’s most powerful nation overturn the will of its own citizens to install this idiot as its head-of-state?”

I vow so long as I am president to make sure that those lives were not lost in vain.

Too late. Those brave men and women were lost in vain the moment you allowed ideology and political one-upsmanship to take precedent over reason and evidence in order to launch this damn-fool idealistic crusade!

I need a stiff drink, and it’s not even Tuesday yet!

McCain’s Democratic flirtations

No, really! McCain’s a maverick! Honest! Why are you laughing?

* Via Elizabeth Bumiller at the NYT.

Sidebar: The tangential connection is vis a vis McCain’s crazy pastor endorsements, in case you’re wondering.

Back when I worked for a local grocery chain, I would occasionally see this bumper sticker that annoyed the hell out of me:

And so, in light of McBush’s crazy pastor endorsements, and as an “in yo’ FACE, Mo-Fo’s!” to the wingnuts and the media (but I repeat myself), here’s my response:

Jane Hamsher asks:

Will McCain Get A Pass On Racist Video?

Of course he will. After all, he’s a Man Of The People™ who’s an Expert On Foreign Policy™.

This has been Easy Answers to Simple Questions: Naked Racism Edition.

Today marks the fifth anniversary of The Big Mistake™. (Take the left tunnel, Indy!)

And naturally, Worst President Ever had some “thoughts” on the subject:

Because we acted, Saddam Hussein no longer fills fields with the remains of innocent men, women and children. Because we acted, Saddam’s torture chambers and rape rooms and children’s prisons have been closed for good. Because we acted, Saddam’s regime is no longer invading its neighbors or attacking them with chemical weapons and ballistic missiles. Because we acted, Saddam’s regime is no longer paying the families of suicide bombers in the Holy Land. Because we acted, Saddam’s regime is no longer shooting at American and British aircraft patrolling the no-fly zones and defying the will of the United Nations. Because we acted, the world is better and United States of America is safer.

Stubborn as always, he’s just as delusional as he was when he launched this quagmire:

Our nation enters this conflict reluctantly — yet, our purpose is sure. The people of the United States and our friends and allies will not live at the mercy of an outlaw regime that threatens the peace with weapons of mass murder. We will meet that threat now, with our Army, Air Force, Navy, Coast Guard and Marines, so that we do not have to meet it later with armies of fire fighters and police and doctors on the streets of our cities.

By the way, this is the same war that Sen. McSame thinks is just so awesome and wants to continue “To Infinity…and Beyond!”…or at least through 2108.:

“We are succeeding. And we can succeed, and American casualties overall are way down,” McCain told CNN in an interview during his one-day visit.

McCain also criticized the position of the Democratic presidential contenders, who favor withdrawing more U.S. troops from Iraq. “I just think what that means is Al Qaeda wins. They tell the world that. And we fight here again and around the Middle East,” McCain told the cable channel ahead of his departure for Israel and Europe.

Meanwhile, Darth Cheney tells the 66% of Americans who think this war wasn’t worth it to go fuck themselves:

[ABC News White House correspondent Martha] RADDATZ: Two-thirds of Americans say it’s not worth fighting.

CHENEY: So?

RADDATZ: So? You don’t care what the American people think?

CHENEY: No. I think you cannot be blown off course by the fluctuations in the public opinion polls.

No word yet on whether or not Cheney has sent out hunting invitations to the two-thirds of his employers who don’t approve of the war.

And while we’re at it, why is that the Dirty Fucking Hippies™ that the “librul” media dismissed out-of-hand as Unserious™, Shrill™ Far-Left Loons™ back when this whole thing started were so totally right about the war? And why does the “librul” media still dismiss them out-of-hand as Unserious™, Shrill™ Far-Left Loons™?

I know I’m not the first to ask this. But still, the question must be asked as many times as necessary to get it through your thick skulls, wingnuts:

WHY is THIS okay:

And WHY is THIS okay:

But not THIS?

Inquiring minds want to know.