JABbering Stooge

Mitch McShameless (R — Spite Caucus) falls in line on the auto bailout:

Bailout for the Big Three stalls in Senate
GOP senators demand key upfront concessions from United Auto Workers

WASHINGTON - With time growing short, the $14 billion auto industry bailout bill stalled in the Senate on Thursday as Republicans demanded upfront concessions from the United Auto Workers as the price for their support.

UAW and auto industry officials were in talks with key Republicans and Democrats at the Capitol, although it wasn’t clear what, if any, givebacks the union was willing to discuss.

The developments unfolded after Senate Republican leader Mitch McConnell of Kentucky joined other GOP lawmakers in announcing his opposition to a White House-backed bill that was approved by the House on Wednesday. He called for an alternative that would reduce the wages and benefits of the Big Three automakers to bring them in line with those paid by Japanese carmakers Nissan, Toyota and Honda.

Earth to Sen. McConnell, the wages of those evil union workers are already down to non-union levels! You’re squeezing blood from a stone here. Any more cuts and those demonic union workers will owe their employers every pay period. Do you really want the auto industry to adopt a payroll pyramid scheme?

Come to think of it, that’s conservative fiscal/tax policy in a nutshell.

Here’s McShameless’s Senate speech on the auto bailout on truth serum:

These are turbulent times for the U.S. economy. Over the past several months, Americans have seen giant companies fail due to our policy of “golden parachutes for the Bob Lutz’s of the world, golden showers for everyone else”, significant job losses among the “mythical little people” so that AIG execs can wipe their asses with the bailout money, and, after unprecedented totally predictable problems in the credit markets that we chose to ignore, the frightening prospect of total disarray within our nation’s Main Wall Street economy.

The crisis in the credit markets came at us quickly. was 28 years in the making — and you suckers have been left holding the bag! HAHAHA! Suck my dick, bitches! We were told that urgent government action was needed in order to shore up the broader economy — and that failure to act would lead to a complete collapse of consumer credit, the very lifeblood of our nation’s economy.

Under ordinary circumstances, I would have opposed such a measure. Government intervention in the marketplace cuts against all my ordinary impulses — unless it robs the poor to pay the corporate shills who own my soul. But this was not an ordinary event. I, and many others, believed that extraordinary action was needed to protect millions of ordinary Americans from the colossal and far-reaching mistakes of a few turn America’s tax and economic policy system into one giant pyramid scheme, siphoning the wealth produced by America’s labor force to line the pockets of the ultra-elite. And action was taken.

The systemic breakdown that some envisioned has not occurred, so there is reason to believe that the medicine has had some its desired effect. But, on the whole, the overall economy continues to struggle — all according to plan. Some industries have been hit harder than others. And one of them is the auto industry.

The problems in the auto industry have been self-inflicted and long in the making. But last month the situation grew so dire that American automakers came to Washington (in their corporate jets) with an urgent appeal for federal help. Over the past few weeks, lawmakers Democrats have taken the time to examine the problems at these companies and the solutions that they have proposed. And now the American taxpayers are being asked to put their money behind a plan that is aimed at helping these companies survive.

Republicans received that plan late yesterday morning. We reviewed it closely to see if it meets the criteria that I have laid out repeatedly for taxpayer-protections and an effective strategy for securing the long-term viability of these companies our delusional demands that reality match our ideology. In the end, I concluded that it does not.

In some most ways, the proposal that was worked out by the White House and Congressional Democrats appears is tough. It calls on struggling, top-heavy auto companies and autoworkers to make the sort of sacrifices they have not been accustomed to making in the past. It also includes time limits as a way of hastening necessary reforms. But in reality, this proposal isn’t nearly tough wingnutty enough.

A primary weakness relates to the so-called “Car Czar,” who has nearly unlimited power to allocate taxpayer dollars but limited ability to force the kinds of tough concessions that long-term viability would require.

Another problem lies outside the proposal itself. And here I’m referring to the type of government action that’s being contemplated. Somewhat lost in the recent debate over the auto industry is the fundamental difference between it and the nearly identical financial rescue plan that Congress approved in October. While that plan was intended to rescue the entire economy our corrupt cronies, this one is intended to save a single industry actual working people. That plan was intended to help everyone — from small business owners to college students our K Street sugar daddies; and every lawmaker Republican who voted for it acted on the belief that that is what it would do.

A failure to appreciate this distinction the depths of our corruption has caused a number of other industries and even a number of municipalities across the country to prepare their own proposals for a government rescue due to all the federal grants we siphoned off to give to the Alan Fishmans of the world as all Americans the unwashed masses weather the tough economy. It has also created the impression in some minds that the federal government is Republicans are picking favorites, and that favored businesses get help while others don’t.

A lot of struggling Americans Lucky Duckies™** are asking where their bailout is. They wonder why one business would get support over another. When it comes to the auto industry, many Republicans in Congress have asked these same questions.

There are many no principled reasons to oppose this bill, but oppose it we shall!. But the simplest one is also the best: “a government big enough to give us everything we want is a government big enough to take everything we have. Corruption is government intrusion into market efficiencies in the form of regulations. That’s Milton Friedman. He got a goddamn Nobel Prize. We have laws against it precisely so we can get away with it. Corruption is our protection. Corruption keeps us safe and warm. Corruption is why you and I are prancing around in here instead of fighting over scraps of meat out in the streets. Corruption is why we win.***” This is as true for individuals as it is for business. It’s the primary principle on which American industry, including the auto industry, the conservative movement was built. And even in turbulent moments like this — perhaps especially at moments like this — it’s a principle well worth defending.

Some argue that the effects of an auto industry collapse would be too acute and far-reaching for an already-struggling economy to bear. This is impossible to know true. And even if we grant that these companies would fail without taxpayer help, we would still have to ask ourselves whether the proposal before us achieves the goal that everyone claims to embrace — namely, the long-term viability of ailing car companies meets our demands that the UAW die a slow, painful death — and, in my view, it does not.

I have already enumerated some of the weaknesses in the plan reasons we Republicans find the plan absolutely unacceptable. But in the end, its greatest single “flaw” is that it promises taxpayer money today for reforms that may or may not come tomorrow doesn’t do enough to destroy the evil unions that are fluoridating our drinking water. And we would not be serving the American taxpayer our monied puppetmasters well if we spent their hard-earned money without knowing with certainty that their investment would result in stronger, leaner auto companies that would not need additional taxpayer help just a few months or weeks down the road the destruction of the last major industrial union.

We simply cannot ask the American taxpayer to subsidize failure save the backbone of what remains of our manufacturing capacity.

All Americans Republicans, including myself, are worried couldn’t give a damn about the future of our nation’s automakers. These companies have a venerable place in the story of modern America. They continue to provide hundreds of thousands of jobs across the country, including nearly 50,000 auto-related jobs of foreign companies who in their home countries give employee benefits, including universal health care, that they can’t give in my own home state of Kentucky.

But many Americans conservative bloggers are also worried about the prospect of the government intervening on behalf of some industries and not intervening on behalf of others — especially when there is no guarantee that the interventions will work. those demonic union workers who dare to politely beg to not be treated like disposable commodities — they should thank us for not mowing them down in the streets like the ungrateful wretches that they are! They wonder when the spending stops. If I were to vote in favor of this bill, I would not have a good answer for them.

The best route for the long-term viability of ailing car companies may be a rocky one. Government help Making the auto execs sacrifice one red cent is not the only option. It’s not even the best option. Long-term viability is still possible. But it’s only possible if these companies are forced to make the tough choices necessary for their survival abolish the unions.

Senator Corker has proposed an amendment that would go a long way toward improving ruining this bill. In keeping with the “principles” I’ve outlined, the Corker Amendment does not just encourage reform union-busting, it requires it. And it does so with crucial cruel specificity. First, participating companies would be required to reduce their outstanding debt by at least two-thirds through an equity swap with bondholders.

The Corker Amendment also requires that labor costs at participating companies be brought on par with lowered way below that of companies like Nissan, Toyota, and Honda — not tomorrow but immediately — because it is delusional to think that a company which spends $71 $27 per union labor hour could cannot compete with a non-union company in the same industry that spends $49 $30.

The Corker Amendment, in a Crowning Moment of Awesome Chutzpah, would improve the liquidity and cash-flow of automakers by requiring that a portion of the payments made to union accounts consist of company stock union workers to gamble the milk money on a stock market that has lost 40% of its value in one year — most of that in the last few months.

And finally, the Corker Amendment would require participating companies to file for Chapter 11 reorganization if any of these conditions aren’t met by a fixed date — all the better to rip up those pesky union contracts.

The Corker Amendment forces unnecessary reforms, holds companies accountable union workers to an impossible standard, and assures taxpayers that these companies won’t be back for more. If legislative action were necessary, the Corker proposal would make many much needed and dramatic improvements to destroy everything good about the underlying bill.

I, like all of my colleagues, want the U.S. auto industry not only to survive but to thrive. And by cutting raising costs, streamlining outsourcing production, increasing reducing fuel efficiency, and investing in preventing new technologies and attractive, more competitive ugly, less competitive designs, American auto companies will once again continue to make cars that people all over the world no one will want to buy. Then Americans will never be able to say again with pride that our cars are the best.

In addition to protecting the taxpayer CEO, this is a goal that Republicans have been fighting hard for in this debate. And in my view, it’s a goal that is well worth our efforts.

Bah-dup-dah-dah-daaaaaaaaah! K-Lo’s lovin’ it!

* McShameless is in good company. His colleague from South Carolina, Jim DeMint (R — Spite Caucus) just called the auto union a bunch of worthless “barnacles”.

** Cf.

*** Cf.