JABbering Stooge

Following on my previous post, Chris Matthews stops being a right-wing tool long enough to smack down Eyes Bishop Thomas Tobin…HARD!

Oh, it is a thing of beauty, is it not?

Fair enough! HA!

MUSIC TO MY EARS: When you’ve made professional outrage maven Bill Donohue lose control of his sphincter, you know you’ve done your job!

The United States is NOT a theocracy, despite your efforts to make it one.

Holy fuckbeans:

Sweet Zombie Jeebus!

You stay KKKlassy, GOP.

Shorter Ann Outhouse Althouse:

“This despicable attack on Assemblywoman Scozzafava offends me personally and exemplifies exactly what’s wrong with Hoffman and his right wing backers.”

• War is peace! Ignorance is strength! Rush Limbaugh’s nakedly sexist attack on Dede Scozzafava is “good feminism!”

“Shorter” concept created by Daniel Davies, perfected by Elton Beard and given a beneficial mutation by the fine folks at Sadly, No!
I am aware of all Internet tradtions.™

Nearly five months later, the gang of theocratic thugs who laughably call themselves the “pro-life” movement continue to piss on Dr. Tiller’s grave:

An Army of God manual. A prison cookbook compiled by a woman doing time for abortion clinic bombings and arsons. An autographed bullhorn.

These are among the items that abortion foes plan to auction on eBay and other Web sites in a fundraiser for Scott Roeder, the Kansas City man charged with killing Wichita abortion doctor George Tiller.

“This is unique,” said Regina Dinwiddie [As JJ notes, Dinwiddie was the first person convicted under the Freedom of Access to Clinic Entrances (FACE) Act — Ed.], a Kansas City anti-abortion activist who will sign the bullhorn. “Nobody’s ever done this before. The goal is that everybody makes money for Scott Roeder’s defense.”

One abortion-rights leader called the auction deplorable and said it could lead to more violence. [Gee, ya think?! — Ed.]

“The network of extremists promoting and defending the murder of doctors is contributing to escalating threats against clinics and doctors across the country,” said Kathy Spillar, executive vice president of the Feminist Majority Foundation.

You know, if these assholes had names like Sajid, Yasser, or Mohammed and the organization in question was, say, the Islamic American Relief Agency, this auction would’ve been dead in its tracks, the organization would’ve had its assets seized as a “terrorist cell,” and the perpetrators would already be on their way to Gitmo to be subjected to “enhanced interrogation” torture.

“Law & Order’s” anti-choice propaganda

“Shorter” concept created by Daniel Davies, perfected by Elton Beard and given a beneficial mutation by the fine folks at Sadly, No!
I am aware of all Internet tradtions.™

Un-frackin’-believable:

On Nov. 1, a law in Oklahoma will go into effect that will collect personal details about every single abortion performed in the state and post them on a public website. Implementing the measure will “cost $281,285 the first year and $256,285 each subsequent year.” Here are the first eight questions that women will have to reveal:

1. Date of abortion [So we can update our sexcrime statistics, eh? — Ed.]

2. County in which abortion performed [All the better to vector in those OK National Guard Black Hawk Helicopters for an attack, amirite? — Ed.]

3. Age of mother [The sooner we can shame little Suzie into “consenting” to FGM keeping her slutty legs closed, the better! — Ed.]

4. Marital status of mother (married, divorced, separated, widowed, or never married) [This is so We The Government of the Theocratic Republic of Oklahoma can turn you over to your Commander husband/father for a proper honor killing. — Ed.]

5. Race of mother [We The Government of the Theocratic Republic of Oklahoma are concerned that too many white, Christian women are committing Gender Treason™. If the brown people and Muslims want to abort all their offspring, more power to them! — Ed.]

6. Years of education of mother (specify highest year completed) [The fewer the better, in the eyes of the Oklahoma lege. — Ed.]

7. State or foreign country of residence of mother [See my comment on question 5. — Ed.]

8. Total number of previous pregnancies of the mother
   Live Births
   Miscarriages
   Induced Abortions
   [Because We The Government of the Theocratic Republic of Oklahoma simply MUST know the extent of little Suzie’s string of sexcrimes! We can’t possibly cum mete out proper punishment for her wanton harlotry without it! — Ed.]

*SIGH* The Earth-Shattering Kaboom can’t come fast enough, it seems.

…this would be the only type of “art” that could legally be produced. (Yes, I said “legally.”)

The “artist,” Jon McNaughton, is trying to propagate the notion that America is a “Christian Nation™®©,” and that only by ripping the Constitution to shreds and becoming a theocracy can we “get right with Zombie Jesus, as the Founding Fathers intended.” This is basically the radical Christianist right’s version of Piss Christ, only unlike those on the right, I don’t want it censored, I just want to mock it! (That IS still legal, right?)

Shall we?

Shorter Longer Phyllis Schlafly:

• Do you realize that in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk, ice cream? Ice cream, Huckabee? Children’s ice cream!…You know when fluoridation began?…1792. 1792, Huckabee. How does that coincide with your post-Enlightenment feminazi conspiracy, huh? It’s incredibly obvious, isn’t it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual, and certainly without any choice. That’s the way your hard-core feminazi works.

“Shorter” concept created by Daniel Davies, perfected by Elton Beard and given a beneficial mutation by the fine folks at Sadly, No!
I am aware of all Internet tradtions.™

With apologies to Stanley Kubrick and Sterling Hayden.

I can’t really add too much to what JJ said about the senseless double-homicide in Owosso, Michigan, but I will say this: the fact that the Coerced Delivery Brigade is trying to equate this with the EIGHT victims of anti-abortion terrorism says a lot about the value they place on the life of OB/GYNs who perform abortion versus the value of the lives of their membership. One Fetus Fetishist is worth at least eight Dr. Tillers, in the eyes of these people.

To make matters worse, some Fetus Fetishists are deliberately ignoring the condemnations of the violence from pro-choice bloggers in order to shriek “Where are the feminazis?” They neither know nor care that some of us would prefer to wait for ALL of the facts to come in before offering anything beyond the standard “We condemn all abortion-related violence, no matter which side it comes from,” as if our “silence” were somehow more contemptible than the flood of verbal coprophilia that was tweeted by the Coerced Delivery Brigade in the aftermath of Dr. Tiller’s murder.

I BELIEVE THIS PROVES MY POINT: If this New York Times article is true, then indeed Mr. Pouillon’s views were at issue in his murder. In which case, his murder was indeed the despicable act of a coward, just as much as the murder of Dr. Tiller was the despicable act of a coward. See how easy that was, Fetus Fetishists? No need to resort to this “He was a mass murderer who got what he deserved!” bullshit. (I’m looking at you, Randall Terry!)

CURIOUSER AND CURIOUSER: AP says that abortion had nothing to do with the murder of Mr. Pouillon. This is why saying anything beyond “All abortion-related political violence is to be condemned, and anyone who engages in it needs to be put away for a really long time,” before all the facts come out is just partisan masturbation.