JABbering Stooge

If you get to insist that Obama purge his administration of 9/11 Truthers (real and imagined), then can we insist that the next Republican president’s administration be free of Birth Certificate Truthers? Or is that different somehow?

Two bits of naked GOP hypocrisy about education for you today. (Eww, I just got a bad mental image from having “naked” and “GOP” in the same sentence.) First, this video call to volunteerism that was shown in a school assembly at Eagle Bay Elementary School in Farmington, Utah got the conservatives’ panties in a collective bunch:

Okay, I’ll admit that the script could’ve benefited from more time in the idea oven (Only flush the toilet after “leaving a deuce?” WTF?!), but is siccing your flying monkey right fanbase on the principal whose only crime was showing the video in the hopes of creating another Denice Denton really the solution?

And besides, you just know that if Jon Voight, Chuck Norris, Charlie Daniels, Fred Thompson, Jerry Doyle, Patricia Heaton, Elisabeth Hasselbeck, Ben Stein, Dennis Miller, Bo Derek, Pat Sajak, Kirk Cameron and Stephen Baldwin had made a video exhorting impressionable young kids to pledge “to be of service to” The Most Holy George W. Christ The Infallible, these very same conservatives would be cheering.

Fucking hypocrites.

And that’s not all. When Education Secretary Arne Duncan announced that President Obama would be giving a nationally televised address to school children on September 8, 2009, the conservative response was embarrassingly predictable:

Oddly (or perhaps not so oddly), conservatives don’t see anything creepy about (or seem to have conveniently forgotten) this address by Bush the Elder to American grade school students back in October of 1991:

Or this famous gaffe-filled photo op by The Most Holy George W. Christ The Infallible:

Nope, no brainwashing there.

Mind you, these are the very same conservatives who want to force your kids to learn that Jesus rode a dinosaur in science class, dictate what your kids are allowed to read for English class, feed them lies about sex that lead them to believe that Mountain Dew™ is a spermicide, and rewrite history textbooks to contain only pro-conservative goodfacts.

Indoctrination: It’s only OK when conservatives do it.

If Sen. Kennedy was a traitor for the discredited trope that he was a Commie agent out to sap Reagan’s precious bodily fluids, then was Nixon a traitor for undermining LBJ’s efforts to end the war in Vietnam?

Or is that somehow different?

I will not be lectured by those who were munging* Reagan’s corpse on national TV on how to mourn Ted Kennedy.

* Cf.

Eric Boehlert has a must-read article on the “librul” media’s treatment of the DFH’s who wisely foresaw the disaster awaiting us in Iraq vs. its treatment of the Teabaggers over at Media Matters.

Check it out.

DougJ is shrill (slightly fixed):

When someone a black man talks back to a cop in his own house, that’s disorderly conduct.

When people make death threats and start fights in public, that’s exercising their First Amendment rights.

So it would seem.

Here’s that paragon of civility, Glenn Beck, in action:

And in other news, Mike Malloy is a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad poopyhead who needs to be shot have the brakes on his car sabotaged… or at least be fired.

Yes, let’s talk about civility, Michelle. Tell me, is this

your idea of civility?

Or this?

Or this?

Or this?

Or this?

Or this?

Or this?

Or this?

Or this?

Or this?

Or this?

I think I’ve made my point.

In other news, Glenn “I’m thinking about killing Michael Moore” Beck is an innocent soul full of sweetness and light who would never hurt a fly, while Mike Malloy’s rant about Mr. Beck proves that The Left™®©, and The Left™®© alone, are unhinged, hate-filled poopyheads who need to be shot on sight. Michelle Malkin said so.

It’s the only thing I can think of that would explain why he would open his latest column thusly:

Scolding Americans for our various sins is proving popular among an elite group of self-appointed moralists.

Yes, Mr. Hanson. You’re right. Scolding Americans for our various sins is very popular among an elite group of self-appointed moralists.

Life just isn’t fair to the Andrei Zhdanov of the Right, Brent Bozell. I mean, the very notion that at any given time someone in the media can disagree with him and still be gainfully employed afterward must really stick in his craw. It’s no wonder then, that he spent last Wednesday riding to the defense of the king of personal attacks, Rush Limbaugh. In his attempt to shield Limbaugh from any criticism whatsoever, he pointed to acerbic comments about Limbaugh from Ed Schultz, Ron Reagan, Jr., Jon Stewart and Mike Malloy as examples of how… wait for it… The LEFT™®© are solely responsible for the coarsening of our public discourse and that only The LEFT™®© could be so hateful.

No, seriously.